Alone

The past few weeks have been rough. I found out that nothing that I do makes me happy. I only find happiness in the time I'm alone. Not even spending time with my friends helps. They've helped me tremendously. Praying and stuff for me. Thanks whoever you are.  I've realized that the world is cruel and there's nothing I can do about it. Humans do not have the capacity for good.  The only good in this world is Jesus.  I wish I knew Him.  Our ambitions in life are like a plague to the morality of others hearts. We alone are only capable of sustaining ourselves. The only way for us to cure this sickness is to die. When we allow our own ambitions rise up, we are choking the life out of everyone else.  We need to die to ourselves. Jesus is the only cure.  I wish I knew someone like that.  Everyone I know has their own motives, including myself.  I'm looking for a pure heart. I'm searching for that ray of light named Jesus to show. But I won't find it in people anymore.  I've been going about it all wrong.  Sure, I see Jesus in people but He is quickly put out when their comfort zone gets checked. The only way I will find Him is if I seek Him. I love You, I need You, Please help... Faith in people is vanity. Faith in Jesus is life.  I've grown so offended at the church.  I hate corporate religiousness.  It's terrible.  We've taken Jesus out of the streets and locked Him inside a building.  We've somehow managed to place Him in a box and reserve His goodness, grace, and love for the suit and tie wearing bigot that plagues our society.  I'm sorry if I'm offending you. Please realize this is not an attack, it's just my heart. I myself have been so blind and passive to let this get to me.  I can't change corporate church, but I can change myself. I can make a difference.  People need Jesus love. They're not going to set foot into a church building anymore.  The days of bringing your friend to church or a revival is over.  So many people are like me. Church hurt and offended. They won't come to a church. Stop inviting them to church and take Jesus out of the box. We carry power and love through the Holy Spirit. It's time to take Jesus to them.  It's our fault so many young people hate church. We're all to blame. Die and redeem yourself.  Jesus is waiting for us to move. Hearts have been prepared for the harvest. It's our turn. I want to love the church again. I want to feel apart of a family again.  I hate my church.  But that's my problem and no one else's.  I need faith in God's people again; it probably won't happen. Prove me wrong church